Grind or die.
I have lived in Bayville for a little over two years now. I moved up from Barnegat to be closer to Toms River where I am the Lead Pastor of Wellspring Church. I really wanted to buy a house in Toms River. I couldn’t find anything move in ready and/or that wouldn’t eventually need some handiwork. I’m, well, not handy.
The average cost of a home in Toms River is roughly $280,000. The average household income is $72,000. According to Nerdwallet.com if you put $10,000 down, have zero debt and good credit, that income would be able to sustain a mortgage of roughly $263,000.
So here is the truth that many of you already know, Toms River is a hard-working middle class community. For many within our community, we don’t know how to get by. Maybe better put, we don’t know if we can get by.
"For many within our community, we don’t know how to get by. Maybe better put, we don’t know if we can get by."
I’m not a financial expert. Not in the least. I can list for you a thousand times I’ve made mistakes. Many of my personal investments have not panned out. I can’t offer you help there by any means! I also can’t hide the fact that I love Jesus and I strive to honor Him in my finances. So, in looking to honor God, I’ve allowed Him to show me things that I think are relevant to the situation many in Toms River find themselves in. I could share with you 89 things I’ve learned the hard way, but for the sake of this post, I want to share four.
With each item, I’ll share a Proverb that I think speaks to the concept being mentioned. If you are reading this and have little understanding of the Bible, that is ok! Proverbs are simple pearls of wisdom. While they are simple to understand, they are often hard to live out!
Stay away from LA LA Land!
Early on, I didn’t have a budget. I got my paycheck. I paid whatever bills I could. Kept enough in the account to have a little fun. I enjoyed this weekly grind of hoping I would get by. The times I was reminded this doesn’t really work is when Bank of America would call looking for their $35 overdraft fees. I’d think to myself, “I have no money and you want money that I obviously don’t have.” I had no plan and the results showed.
As I meet with people in a local coffee shop, Cafe Enigma (it’s amazing, you need to check it out), I find this is a common issue. I’ll sit down with them and ask what their budget is. Typically they don’t have one. So then, what is your plan? What comes next is LA LA LAND!!!! I get paid, I’ve got bills. I pay them. I just can’t get ahead. Then, without a clear picture of their current situation, they tell me about their plans to get out of the mess. They will tell me the income they need to make it. They will tell me they can afford an apartment, a car payment, a vacation, etc. LA LA LAND, LA LA LAND, LA LA LAND! You don’t know what you can afford because you simply don’t know. Talk, talk, talk! It’s all just talk! Proverbs 14:23 says, “All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.” Talking as if you have a plan without having an actual plan will result in poverty.
How do you stay out of La La Land? HAVE A PLAN! It takes work to have a plan, but oh man is it worth it!
CREATE A PLAN!
The next thing we do over a cup of coffee is open up a Google Spreadsheet. I make two columns, the first is income. We go through everything they do to make money. I ask the tough questions to get at if this is reality. I err on the side of being conservative because an infatuated income will keep you in La La Land! So column A is all the money they make in a month!
In the second column we right down everything they spend their money on. I have them open up their bank account on their phone. They scroll through it without showing me, and I simply input what they tell me. We list everything. Column B is everything they spend in a month.
Then I do a simple formula to show the difference. 95% of the time column B is bigger than column A. That’s never good! The other 5% are times where they are able to build a savings but typically not at the rate they want to in order to meet their financial goals.
"When you see everything you spend your money on, it helps you ask the question; are these things more important than my long term goals?"
It is crazy what happens when we put things on paper. Oh ya, I guess I don’t need Spotify, Apple Music, Netflix and YouTube TV. I guess I could get rid of one or two of those things! When you see everything you spend your money on, it helps you ask the question; are these things more important than my long term goals? If not, start cutting expenses! Your budget should reflect your priorities, make it!
I’ve learned this from Dave Ramsey. He has a well-written article on this; https://www.daveramsey.com/blog/how-to-make-a-zero-based-budget
Proverbs 21:5 says, “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.” In short, having a plan and sticking to a plan will help you! So do it! But it’s hard. Yup, so invite someone to help you!
It’s OK to talk about money!
Ok, I should clarify, with the right heart, it’s ok to talk about money. If you are boasting and talking a big game, it’s probably just that, a game. So, shut up and keep it to yourself. In our society money is such a personal thing. Why? Because we know what we spend our money on is a snapshot of our priorities. Yes, when out in the open it can be embarrassing.
"Because we know what we spend our money on is a snapshot of our priorities."
But, if you’re a hard-working middle class citizen, many you don’t have much to hide. So, ask for help. The question becomes who do you ask?
If you want to get help on your baseball swing, do you ask the person who just got cut for JV or the star who just was drafted out of high school? Obviously the kid drafted. If you are looking for wisdom on finances, look for someone with a proven track record. Look for someone who is also in the middle class but making it, or someone that has gotten himself out of the middle class altogether. Proverbs 13:20 says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Do you hang with people looking for a quick fix? You likely will as well. Do you hang with people who have no financial plan? You likely won’t either. Do you hang with people struggling to get by because of unwise choices? You likely will to.
I had to sit down with people willing to tell me what I needed to hear. If I only talk with people who will tell me what I want to hear, my situation will never change. So, have coffee with someone who you respect and who would be willing to ask you the tough questions.
"Have coffee with someone who you respect and who would be willing to ask you the tough questions."
This brings me to my last point;
Be Generous.
Click away sure. No, I don’t want your money. No, I’m not just saying some pastor type thing. I don’t want money to control me. I want to control my money. I don’t want to live for money because money comes and goes. If I live for money, then my life will forever be a roller coaster. Striving to be generous is one way to protect against money being everything in our lives. Proverbs 11:25 says, “A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.”
This is a matter of priorities. Rich people are not typically generous. They typically give away a very small percentage of their income. So, if it’s not a habit you have now, it likely won’t be a habit you gain should you increase your wealth. Build a habit of generosity into your lifestyle now. When you do, money is less likely to control you, the tough decisions become a little easier, and God has a unique way of honoring generous people!
"The tough decisions become a little easier, and God has a unique way of honoring generous people!"
Are these four items the end all be all? Surely not. But I do believe they are a great starting point. These are four items that can become building blocks for your financial future. I’d love to get a cup of coffee sometime on Wellspring. Why? Because Wellspring is a generous church that I have the honor and privilege of leading! Keep grinding, you got this.
Pray for One!
Pastor Jason Coache,
Lead Pastor of Wellspring Church
Click here to learn more about Wellspring Church in Toms River!
